1. WHAT DO THESE DISPUTES LOOK LIKE?
All legal disputes have certain common factors and follow a similar process.
Think of a road or a tree diagram with T intersections along the way, at which time you need to take in the surrounding circumstances and make a choice as to whether to go left or right.
Your matter will be like that.
At each of these stages, your advisers be there to help you make an assessment of the facts, look at the options available to you, and choose the one which appears to be the best available.
This choice should always be yours, and your advisers are there to follow your instructions once you have been informed and made that decision.
2. THE INITIAL INTERVIEW WITH YOUR ADVISER
The opening interview should be a self-contained unit designed to give you some kind of knowledge of and control over your circumstances.
The idea of the initial interview, which is normally done as a fixed fee, is to get your story from you, explain the Law, give you an overview of your position, and provide you with some of the tools to make the next few decisions.
You should leave that interview with a general overall knowledge of the battlefield you are entering and some idea of what to do next.
This interview should also explain the role of your adviser and guide.
You may be surprised at the format of this first interview but it should take the form of an information session for you, not a long winded, blow by blow, detailed history of you and your relationship. That can, if necessary, come later.
This initial interview should be all about giving you knowledge not the other way round. You want to know how this process works and the next few steps. Then you can start to come to grips with your surroundings and get a feel for what is going to be happening.
If your adviser doesn’t explain this well enough or in enough detail, press him/her. If you’re still unsatisfied, change advisers!
You should feel comfortable with your adviser and have confidence in the advice you’re receiving. You should also have the feeling that you’re going to be able to understand what you’ll be told in the future. Unfortunately, some lawyers, even today, whilst having very good technical knowledge, don’t have good communication skills and are unable to speak a language others can understand. You do not need a long list of latin phrases and complex explanations from your adviser.
That communication style is your lifeline to good decision making. Remember you’re paying for this; get an adviser you can understand and who can relate to you.
3. DOCUMENTS AND PAYMENT
You may be asked to make payment at the commencement of the legal process. You should ask in advance what the credit arrangements for your adviser are and ensure you have this clear in your mind. Lawyers are required by the Government to give you a written document to sign before you become responsible to pay them anything. There are minimum requirements of disclosure by law firms in this document (called a client agreement or costs agreement).
You must be allowed the opportunity to take this document away.
Only once you are happy that you understand and comply with these requirements, should you sign and engage this adviser.
Some law firms will hold their fees until the end of the matter. If you have assets tied up which will eventually come to you when your argument is settled, you should ask about this possibility. Ensure though that there are no additional or hidden costs in doing it this way.
In some cases Litigation funding is also available. Check however that the rate you are charged is acceptable. Litigation funding is like any other personal loan to purchase something. If you can obtain funding from some other source, or get a loan secured by property, you will pay a lower rate.
4. WHAT TO BRING
Bring along any documentation which is relevant to your situation, correspondence, Orders, figures, bills, anything which you believe might be relevant. If in doubt – bring it along. Practices differ between firms of lawyers. Some will want the originals, some will take copies and return the originals. If your matter escalates into a court action you will need to produce the originals at a later time, so it’s important to know where they are.
5. COMMUNICATION
Clear, simple, jargon free communication is the key to good advice.
If you are not getting information you can understand and the process is not suiting you and bringing your anxiety levels down, say so. If the situation does not improve, CHANGE ADVISERS.
This situation is too important to put up with advice that you find difficult to understand and make decisions upon.
6. WHAT WILL YOU GET OUT OF THIS FIRST INTERVIEW?
At your first interview you should:
(i) get to know your adviser, understand the communication style and become comfortable with it;
(ii) establish some rapport with the firm in general;
(i) tell your story in full to your satisfaction and that of your adviser;
(ii) get an overall view of the process and how it relates to you;
(iii) understand how the Law relates to your circumstances;
(iv) understand what are the next few steps;
(v) find out what the options are for you during those steps;
(vi) begin to know what you can do about the problems facing you;
(vii) leave better equipped and feeling more in control.
If you do not achieve these goals at this interview, say so. If you feel you are not going to achieve them, CHANGE ADVISERS.
7. ASKING QUESTIONS
You should always feel like you can ask questions of your advisers.
You should be aware though that Lawyers sell their time. It is their stock and they sell knowledge; answers to questions.
These answers will increase your costs, so consider your questions and do not use your law firm as a group of counsellors to make you feel better. This is very expensive counselling. Ensure you seek advice from and give instructions to your Lawyers and keep this process clear and clean.
Often, in family law disputes, the law seems unfair and unbalanced. It is true that, since the 1970’s when the Commonwealth Government brought in the Family Law Act, allowing parties to divorce, make arrangements for their children and settle their property, virtually every concept in the (then new) “no fault” system was challenged and argued as too biased in favour of one party or another (often both at the same time).
Over the last three decades or more, some progress has been made but the Act which the Court interprets and through which your adviser navigates and guides you, is still controversial and at times seems unfair.
Try to walk the line between questioning your adviser about these issues (and challenging your adviser to fully explain these issues) and wasting your own money arguing with your adviser about how unfair this is when they cannot do anything about the problem.
This is a common trap into which people fall. They waste endless time (and money), effectively saying to their advisers, “this is outrageous; you have to change this; demand my ex complies with the attached list of demands”, when the plain fact may be that the Act and the Courts will not compel compliance and that particular issue cannot be resolved through an aggressive demand.
Your adviser’s job is to show you options to get to these goals using the Act and the court rules, and also to put these issues in perspective regarding the entire matter. It may be that because of some other legal issues, the thing you’re most concerned about is not an issue in the broad scheme of things.
Make your adviser show you this to your satisfaction. You do not have to swallow whole everything you’re told at face value. Remember you’re paying for this.
Try to avoid though, a long running, useless argument with your adviser, at your expense regarding whether or not it’s fair.
8. OPTIONS FROM HERE
After your initial interview you can:-
(i) instruct your Lawyers to start acting and get on with the matter;
(ii) go away and think about the process, make your decisions and return once you have done so;
(iii) consider taking the next step or two without assistance if that is tactically beneficial and you feel confident.
There will be times when speed is important. You may for example need to have your adviser act quickly to secure assets which are not in your name. There may be property or other assets which can or are about to be hidden. There may be issues of protection for you and/or your children.
Your adviser will understand this and should communicate this to you. You need to feel satisfied and comfortable that this is the case though.
Your adviser may well give you the impression that there is no option but for you to proceed with him/her from here. This is not the case!
You should, after this initial meeting, unless any issues of urgency exist, take time to ensure that you’re comfortable with your adviser and all you’ve been told.
Often that’s a feeling you have straight away, sometimes it takes some reflection. Don’t be rushed. There is an important balance between protecting your rights and position, and feeling like you’re immediately losing control and a passenger on a journey to an unknown destination.
If you have the latter feeling:
a) hold off; it may be that your adviser is not the right one for you;
b) you may need to instruct them to take the urgent steps to protect you or your assets, and then consider making a change. This is not ideal but is not a difficult as it seems. Think changing banks or credit card providers as an equivalent of the amount of drama involved.